You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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