We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Randomize
