marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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