CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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