if i can run in heels then i can drive
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize