There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Randomize