24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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