I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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