Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
