East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
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