So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
