I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
I wish you could order shots online.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
