My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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