OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
