i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
