My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
God, you're like boner-b-gone
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
