Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize
