They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
