she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
