i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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