Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
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