I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
