i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
