Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
