drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
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