Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Randomize
