i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
