Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Randomize
