I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Randomize
