Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
