the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize