Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Welp...herpes.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
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