YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I wish there were birth control emojis
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
