Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
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