A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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