Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
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