We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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