we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
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