I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
I want to make a zoo with you.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
It's no shave November. This is our time.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
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