you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
