so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Green mimosas i think yes
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
