My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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