I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
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