it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
