Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
