tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
