Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Randomize
