True but thats because hes a fetus.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
