i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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