if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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