Her vagina should come with caution tape.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
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